Also, since I changed the blog (after losing everything and having to re-install from a backup) I have noticed most of the audio and pictures I had uploaded have disappeared from blog posts and pages, so I will start replacing those at the weekend.

I had a lovely surprise when I returned from France to discover I had made number 21 on a list of the 50 Most Powerful and Influential Women in Social Marketing on the Immediate Influence Blog. I feel quite honored to appear on a list like this – I’m pretty sure it’s the first time, and want to thank anyone who nominated me through Twitter (I sound like I’m making an Oscar acceptance speech – LOL – I’d like to thank God, my parents, the wonderful developers at Twitter…).  I’m not sure how influential or powerful I actually am, but it’s great to see that somebody thinks my ramblings are worth listening to.

In France I was – yet again – trying to explain to my friends the point of Twitter, Facebook and other social networking sites. They couldn’t understand the value of creating communities and networking online, whether for business or pleasure. We came to the realization that our online personas often reflect our offline ones. I am essentially a sociable, chatty person who is always ready to extend my circle of friends and acquaintances, while they only like to socialise within their small group of friends. I did try to explain that you could choose who you did or didn’t follow/listen to very easily, but I have not converted them.

I love to communicate with people and social media offers me that opportunity. It certainly beats sitting on a cold bench in the city centre chatting to anyone who may walk by and show an interest!

I started writing a reply but it got so long I decided I’d make it a blog post instead.

There are fewer women in Internet Marketing just as there are fewer women in business and marketing as a whole. The number of women getting involved in IT is declining, and many people springboard from IT into internet marketing because they think they already have the skills for it. Now, I’m not going to get into a debate about why this is, but I suspect it is partly an education issue, and partly about the way others view women and women view themselves. Who knows? There simply are fewer female Internet Marketers.

However, I do think there are more females IMers than anyone realises. Women are less likely to attend IM seminars (perhaps due to family constraints), and if you look at any IM forum there are many women subscribed to them and making some useful posts, but they tend not to be overly vocal. Many Work At Home Mums find there way into Internet Marketing but have no desire to use up their already precious time commenting in forums.

I have had this discussion with a number of female Internet Marketers. When you go to an IM seminar or read emails in this field there is the impression that there is a bit of a boy’s club that all the male IM “gurus” belong to. It’s not that they don’t have respect for the females out there – Rosalind Gardner, Alice Seba, Michelle Macpherson, to name just a few – it’s just boys will be boys, and they like their toys and partying together and showing off their cars and phones to each other. OK, maybe that’s a bit unfair. But, I think they do have a greater need to buddy-up with others in the same field as them.

Most women who are successful in the IM world have different priorities, and while they want to be successful in their field they are less concerned with letting everyone know about it. I know a few women who are super-successful Internet Marketers but they keep it very quiet – happy to get on with making the money without needing any of the glory. I also know a lot of women who are content to make a steady income in this field in order to be able to stay at home with their kids and have a good lifestyle but who have no intention of stepping it up and making millions.

If you are a woman in the IM world and are feeling isolated or want to find a female mentor, I would suggest you look within the forums you frequent or at seminars you attend. Make friends with people and keep an eye on who makes pointed observations. You will find that they are usually the ones who are least likely to make a noise or who are incredibly helpful but never brag.

I made a friend at the first marketing seminar I ever attended who pointed me towards the Thirty Day Challenge material from the first year. Since then we have attended a couple of seminars together and have stayed in touch. Whenever we meet up we have the best masterminding sessions. If you saw us at a seminar you would think I was the most successful simply because she is quite reserved about her business while I love the sound of my own voice (hazard of the job, and because my main focus has always been to sell my voiceover services). At the last seminar she even started telling everyone that I was her mentor, when if anything it is the other way round. It became an in joke! But it made me very conscious of the fact that at every seminar I have attended the people making the most noise are not usually the ones making the most money or having the most success.

You may have your male Internet Marketing “gurus” talking about their last masterminding session together in Las Vegas, but to be honest it pays for them to boost their connections because they are selling to the IM world. However, at any IM seminar you could be sitting next to someone who is making millions selling information products to Scuba Divers and just wants to keep a low profile. It’s not that they are avoiding conversations and friendships, they are just a little more careful about what they say and to whom they say it.

So, if you want to find a mentor or someone to brainstorm with, my recommendation is not to follow the loudest crowd but to strike up friendships and relationships with those you encounter in forums and at seminars. If you are doing the Thirty Day Challenge this year, become part of a group with people (or women) with different backgrounds, abilities and experience. Most people find their mentors initially through building a relationship or recommendations from friends. While it is possible to approach someone you respect directly and persuade them to be your mentor, forging an initial relationship with them will strengthen the chance of them saying yes.